— April 4, 2026 —
Rafaella’s Bat Mitzvah
We joyfully request the pleasure of your company as Rafaella is called to the Torah.
We'll start with a reform ceremony, and then celebrate all of the hard work at a dance-filled bash later in the day.
When
Saturday, April 4, 2026
Ceremony: 11:30am—1:30pm
Party: 4pm—10pm
Please note exact times will be updated closer to the day, so please see the official invitation and check this site for the latest and greatest information.
The ceremony start time is the official starting time for the weekly Shabbat service at Emanu-El. Please try to arrive on time to minimize disruption to the other congregants.
Where
Ceremony
Congregation Emanu-El
2 Lake Street
San Francisco, CA
Party
Log Cabin at the Presidio
1299 Storey Avenue
San Francisco, CA
What is a Bat Mitzvah?
At 13, a Jewish woman becomes obligated to observe the commandemends of Judaism. “Bat mitzvah” literally means “daughter of the commandments.” Conversely, “bar mitzvah” means “son of the commandments.”The celebration of a bat mitzvah signifies that Rafaella is beginning and will continue to function as an active and responsible Jew in the synagogue and in the wider Jewish community.
Please scroll down for more information about what you can expect at the ceremony.
What Should I Wear?
Synagogue
Guests at a bat mitzvah ceremony generally wear dressy, somewhat conservative clothing. Emanu-El is a reform congregation, so the dress code isn’t as strict, but we still suggest either a suit or slacks, tie, and jacket for men, and a dress or formal pantsuit for women. We recommend not attending synagogue with bare shoulders.
Kippa
Men should wear a traditional head covering called a kippah (keep-ah) during the service. Wearing a kippah is not a symbol of religious identification, but rather, is a non-denomenational act of showing respect to the sacredness of the worship space. If you don’t own a kippah, have no fear, we will have a basket of kippot (plural for kippah) at the entry to the sanctuary, and guests are welcome to keep it as a memento.
Tallit
The tallit (tall-eet or tall-is) is a prayer shawl Rafaella will wear during the service.The braided fringes at the four corners of the tallit remind Rafaella to observe the commandments of Judaism. Wearing a tallit is reserved for Jews. Although an usher may offer you a tallit at the door, you may decline it if you are not Jewish or are simply uncomfortable wearing such a garment.
Party
For the party, wear cocktail attire that you can dance in. Happen to have something in your closet that fits the Rafaella in Bloom theme? By all means, bright florals are more than appropriate at the evening party!
Shabbat Service
Suggested Synagogue Behavior
Rafaella’s Role
After the Ceremony
What about Gifts?
Each Shabbat , a portion of the Torah advancing each week until the entire Five Books of Moses (from Genesis through Deuteronomy) are completed in a single year. Selected passages from the Prophets are read after the Torah reading. This portion is known as the haftarah (has-tah-rah). A cluster or three or four blessings follow the haftarah.
On Shabbat, the weekly Torah reading is divided into seven sections, each called an aliyah. Various individuals close to Rafaella will walk onto the stage (called the bimah) to chant the special blessing before and after the chanting of each aliyah. This honor is called “receiving the aliyah,” or literally, “going up,” referring not only to physically ascending the stage where the Torah is read, but also evoking the historic ascent to the Temple in Jerusalem.
Jewish worship services are filled with frequent directions to stand for particular prayers and sit for others. Standing and sitting in a Jewish service does not constitute any affirmation of religious belief, it is merely a sign of respect. There may also be instructions to bow at certain parts of the service, and because a bow or prostration is a religiously significant act, feel free to remain standing or sitting as you wish at that point.
Try to follow the service in the prayerbook (called the siddur), and the Chumash (a copy of the Torah). Both are usually printed in Hebrew and English. You are encouraged to participate in the service to the extent you feel comfortable.
Further details are available for those that want to learn more.
All guests and participants are expected to respect the sanctity of the Shabbat Service. We ask all guests to abide by the following:
Set your phone to vibrate.
Do not take pictures in the synagogue, as it is considered disrespectful, and is forbidden.
Do not talk during the Shabbat Service. Even if you see others doing it, it’s considered a breach of decorum.
As part of the Shabbat service, Rafaella will lead prayers, chant from the Torah and Haftorah, and deliver a dvar Torah - a speech about the Torah portion she will be reading.
Rafaella’s mom and dad will also each say a prayer and a short speech. It is also customary to honor certain close friends or family with the honor of removing from and putting the Torah back into the ark. These are a sacred steps in every Shabbat service.
Immediately after the Shabbat service, please join us for a kiddush - a light meal in the space right outside the sanctuary. The kiddush gets its name from the blessing over wine that is recited just before the meal. It’s quite common for a kiddish to include bagels and all sorts of delicious toppings. However, don’t be surprised if you don’t see any bread products at Rafaella’s kiddush as her bat mitzvah takes place during the Jewish holiday of Pesach (Passover), where no leavened bread products are consumed.
To avoid any confusion, you may have heard that it is customary for invited guests to give a gift to the bat mitzvah celebrant. Many of you are traveling from far and wide to celebrate with us in San Francisco. Your presence means the world to us and is all we ask for. If you do choose to honor Rafaella with a gift, we ask that you please deliver them to the party, rather than at the synagogue service.
